10.0832 humour anyone?

WILLARD MCCARTY (willard.mccarty@kcl.ac.uk)
Mon, 7 Apr 1997 22:05:49 +0100 (BST)

Humanist Discussion Group, Vol. 10, No. 832.
Center for Electronic Texts in the Humanities (Princeton/Rutgers)
Centre for Computing in the Humanities, King's College London
Information at http://www.princeton.edu/~mccarty/humanist/

[1] From: Nico Weenink <noki@worldonline.nl> (71)
Subject: Fw: Microsoft Resturant (fwd)

Hi everyone,

I got this message forwarded from Mr. Norman Holland, the editor of the
Psyart Listserv. Hope you like it.

Best regards,

Nico.

----------
> From: John B. Holland <jholland@delphi.umd.edu>
> To: Multiple recipients of list PSYART <PSYART@NERVM.NERDC.UFL.EDU>
> Subject: Microsoft Resturant (fwd)
> Date: vrijdag 4 april 1997 23:36
>
> As someone who loves restaurants and has suffered with various
> "support" systems from software manufacturers, I can't resist posting
> this (forwarded to me by my computer guru son). --Best, Norm
> ----------------------------Original message----------------------------
>
>
>
>
> IF RESTAURANTS FUNCTIONED LIKE MICROSOFT!
>
> Patron: Waiter!
> Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill and I'll be your Support Waiter. What
> seems to be the problem?
> Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
> Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
> Patron: No, it's still there.
> Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it
> with a fork instead.
> Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
> Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of
> bowl are you using?
> Patron: A SOUP bowl!
> Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration
> problem; how
> was the bowl set up?
> Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with
> the fly in my soup?
> Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the
> fly in your soup?
> Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
> Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the
> Day?
> Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?
> Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
> Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
> Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
> Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the check. I'm running
> late now.
> [Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.]
>
> Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
> Patron: This is potato soup.
> Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
> Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
> [Waiter leaves.]
> Patron: Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!
> ----------
> The check:
> Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . . $ 5.00
> Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . . $ 2.50
> Access to support . . . . . . . . . . $10.00
> Editors Note: Bug in the soup included at no extra charge (will be
> fixed with Tomorrow's soup of the day)
>
> You assume, ofcourse, that the waiter ANSWERS. My waiter is dumb.
> He neither speaks nor writes.